Archive for the 'Entertainment' category

PSP2: It Will Replace Your Home Console

Apr 03 2011 Published by under Entertainment, Opinions, Products

Many folks say that they are not looking for home console ports on their handheld gaming devices. They claim, “I don’t want Call of Duty on my handheld, I want mobile specific games!”

These people don’t know what they want.

If you can jump into an online match of Battlefield Bad Company 2 or the latest Call of Duty game on a portable gaming device, why wouldn’t you want that?

If the hardware can handle the graphics and the physical controls replicate the ones found on home consoles, what exactly is so offensive of having a home console experience on a mobile device?

What I think these people are confusing is the smartphone “time killing” gaming experience (think Angry Birds or Tiny Wings) for a much more dedicated and intense gaming session that is often the goal of portable console owners.

In addition, these people appear to assume that mobile devices aren’t endowed with the right physical controls to replicate the home console experience — in the past this has been largely true. But with the upcoming PSP2’s control layout (including dual analog sticks), this should no longer be an issue.
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Spartacus: Blood and Sand Review

Jan 25 2010 Published by under Reviews, TV Shows

Recently, I watched the premiere episode of Spartacus: Blood and Sand. If you enjoy senseless highly stylized violence, mixed with copious amounts of tits and ass, you will definitely want to catch this new series!

BTW – Season One of Spartacus: Blood and Sand is now available on DVD and Blu-ray.

A Blatant Copy of Past Works?

After watching a few minutes of Spartacus: Blood and Sand you will immediately see its similarity to such movies as The Gladiator and 300. In fact, it wouldn’t be an overstatement to call this mini-series a blatant rip off of past works.

More specifically, the show mirrors The Gladiator’s plot and largely copies 300’s art direction and fight choreography. What the show evidently boils down to is graphic scenes of hand-to-hand combat interrupted by graphic scenes of sex and random nudity.

But I’m not going to harp on the presentation and substance of Spartacus — it offers exactly the kind of mindless testosterone fueled action that certain demographics enjoy. And that’s what this show is all about – simple R-rated entertainment.

Believe me, you already know the setup, the polarized cast good and evil characters and the much romanticized time period of the Roman era. So really, what you’re experiencing is a massive rehash of something many people can’t seem to get enough of – the brave hero who bangs an impossibly hot wife, who has his town destroyed and his woman kidnapped/killed, who then must battle in the arena of death for revenge and justice!

An Adolescent Boy’s Wet Dream

Filled with a cast of hot models, chiseled warriors and teeth gnashing villains, Spartacus is as superficial and contrived as it sounds. There is nothing innovative in its presentation or plot (thus far), but that’s fine if you just want to catch some blood-letting action on a Sunday night — and see the entire female cast nude. Indeed, there are some very hot women on the show, including Viva Bianca and Erin Cummings.

Review Wrap-up

I could barely sit through the first half of the premiere episode knowing exactly what would happen and the premise that was being set. But I did watch the entire episode, due largely to a shameful habit of finishing anything that I’ve started watching. (I need help for that.)

And I’ll probably tune in again next week.

To its credit, the production values are noticeably high and the action isn’t half-bad; I just wish they’d invest in an original plot and use less slow-motion in the action scenes. I also feel that they’ve got a few plot twists up their sleeve that I’m sure we’ll see if the series continues.

I’m cautiously optimistic about Spartacus: Blood and Sand.

Have you seen the show yet? Share us your thoughts.

*UPDATE*

Season One of Spartacus: Blood and Sand is now available on DVD and Blu-ray.

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Street Fighter: The Legend of Bad Movies

Jun 23 2009 Published by under Hot Girls, Movies

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When Kristen Kreuk was cast to play Chun Li in the latest Street Fighter movie, I was pretty stoked. But could she fight? Could she act? Would the battered Street Fighter brand be finally redeemed on the silver screen? These were some heavy questions everyone was asking, including myself.  But really – and I think I speak for a lot of men people here – my main interest was seeing this stunning half-Chinese, half-Dutch girl donning the Chun Li outfit, looking sexy, and making angry-cute faces at the bad guys!

To summarize my thoughts, Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun Li is one of the worst action films I have ever seen, and will hopefully sound the death knell for live action attempts at the series.

The fight sequences, and there aren’t as many as you might expect, are barely a cut above daytime television standards. The wire-fu is particularly egregious, with excessive edits and fast camera pans unable to mask the lack of athletic ability of the cast. For a good reference (if not the golden standard) of what can be performed by a group of well-trained and choreographed actors, see Zhang Ziyi versus Michelle Kwon in Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon for a martial arts masterpiece.

I could go on and on about what makes Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun Li such a bad film, but that would be giving far too much attention to a movie that nobody should have to see. Unless, of course, you are a Kristin Kreuk fan!

Yes, there are plenty of interesting shots of Kristin Kreuk in this film, and she shows her complete range of acting emotions, notably: anger, sadness and anger-sadness. Or, pretty much exactly what she delivered on Smallville for all those years.

Unfortunately, she doesn’t seem to wear any sexy outfits during this outing – not even the high cut skirt worn by Chun-Li in the videogame that is infamously popular among the otaku crowd. It seems that the makers of the film deliberately tried to downplay Kristen’s sex appeal, perhaps to make her a better role model for young women. This was obviously a mistake.

So, if you are a diehard Kristen Kreuk fan, and can stomach the terrible plot, script and acting in this film, at least you can enjoy staring at this magnificent beauty for a solid 90 minutes while you simultaneously try to scrub the rest of the show from your bleeding senses. Also, there are a couple cool tracks by rapper Ace Hood to give the soundtrack a bit of gangstaness, although it’s hardly enough to save the film.

Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun Li gets a 2/10. One point for Kristin Kreuk’s adorably strange facial expressions, and another for featuring Ace Hood on the soundtrack.

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Jordana Brewster Is Better Than Vin Diesel

May 06 2009 Published by under Hot Girls, Movies

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A Vin Diesel Masterpiece of Crap

Do you like seeing car chases in movies? How about ones that are mostly done in computer graphics – an experience that’s little different from watching someone else play a videogame?

Because that’s how I felt after watching Fast and Furious, the latest Vin Diesel flick that also stars Michelle Rodriguez, Paul Walker and Jordana Brewster.

In truth, a few of the chase sequences are probably worth watching once, but largely, the film fails to deliver anything new or exciting to the series. But what were you expecting? It’s the third bloody sequel, and the original wasn’t anything special to begin with. Check out Ronin if you want to see car chases done right. If only it was Deniro instead of Vin Diesel in this film…

Jordana Brewster Improves Things Slightly

The one thing that got me interested enough to watch Fast and Furious is the casting of Jordana Brewster, who plays the sister of Vin Diesel’s character, Mia Toretto. Not that you need to learn anyone’s name in this film. Which gets me thinking, why bother calling Vin Diesel’s character anything other than Vin Diesel!? He plays the same damn character in all his films!

Jordana, who also appeared in the original The Fast and The Furious, did a stint on NBC’s Chuck earlier this year. She’s known for her disarming girl-next-door appeal. With her straight brunette hair, naturally tanned skin and big watery eyes, Jordana Brewster is a world-class babe.

Unfortunately, the makers of Fast and Furious inexplicably dress her up like someone’s Italian grandmother! It’s unbelievable that they don’t make her look sexy at all. Aside from a brief but fully clothed make-out scene, there’s no skin or sex to be had in this film. What a waste of talent!

Concerning Jordana’s role, it’s like she’s cast in a cameo appearance. Saying hi and giving friendly hugs to everyone is all she really does. When is this chic going to get naked, or at least have a mildly erotic sex scene? Certainly not while Vin Diesel is around hogging the spotlight with his goofy mug.

Despite my hopes, I somehow doubt Jordana, a Yale grad and former child soap star, will pursue roles that exploit her sexuality. This is a girl that has skillfully dodged the scandals and tabloid fodder of her Hollywood cohorts. It seems that she’s consciously chosen to live a more private, or perhaps more modest existence. Pity for us.

Final Analysis and Conclusion

The best part of Fast and Furious is near the end, when Jordana Brewster is seen driving a JDM Acura NSX — a sexy girl in a sexy car! — why wasn’t the whole film based around this concept? Instead, most of the film involves following a creepy looking bald dude and a Zack Morris look-alike drive their high school prom cars through silly computer generated tunnels against a politically-correct-because-they’re-racially-diverse field of competitors that always seem to crash or drive slower cars.

At least playing a video game, instead of watching one, is an engaging experience with some level of excitement and unpredictability.

Fast and Furious gets a 2/10, after losing a point for starring Vin Diesel and another for featuring Souljah boy music.

Fast and Furious is now available on Amazon. Own it today and enjoy years of regret.

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